"I need a room. Do you have a vacancy?"

"You are a pimp?"

"Oh, no sir."

"You sell drugs?"

"No, sir."

"Wish you did. I need some coke."

"I'm a Bible salesman, sir."

"That's disgustin'!"

"Just tryin' to spread the word."

"Well, don't spread that shit around me."

"As you wish."

"Fuckin' A!"

― Pulp

Have you ever caused your computer to crash, due to excessive porn viewing?

Do you know who John Holmes was?

Does "glory hole" denote an opening through which one gets their cock sucked, as opposed to the second furnace used in glassblowing?

If you answered "yes" to the above, this article is for you.

Ever queried: "Why isn't there an option for 'No President' on ballots? And if a majority chose this category, we'd literally have no president?"

Since we keep placing politicians in control, and things steadily become worse, have you considered these bastards:

A) are inept, or

B) don't want things to get better?

Why would you appoint senators to build cities? What could legislators possibly know about this subject? The specialty of a politician is to win popular favor.

Wouldn't it make sense to hire architects, construction experts and engineers to address this endeavor, as opposed to politicians ― who are solely adept at swaying public opinion?

"We are living in a world in which nobody is free, in which hardly anybody is secure, in which it is almost impossible to be honest and to remain alive."

― The Road to Wigan Pier

If you've ever pondered the aforementioned, my stories are what you're seeking.

"Outside of The Bible, there is zero historical evidence Jesus Christ ever existed." Such is akin to asserting: "Outside of Spiderman comics, there is zero historical evidence Spiderman ever existed."

Obviously, comic books are not historical records, and neither is The Bible. In fact, we don't even know who wrote this cult playbook. Such stated, we do know who wrote comic books, as the author is listed on each publication. From this context, comics have a more stable foundation than The Bible.

Religion offers the ultimate death insurance. That makes priests the ultimate insurance agents...And who the fuck doesn't love insurance agents?!

Conveniently, this policy never has to pay off. Like all insurance, it's a scam. You've no way of knowing if your lifetime of servitude will win you favor with some higher power, or not. You've just gotta place your faith in — and pledge your allegiance to — a group historically renowned for fucking kids.

"Wandering in a vast forest at night, I have only a faint light to guide me. A stranger appears and says to me: 'My friend, you should blow out your candle in order to find your way more clearly.'

This stranger is a theologian."

― Denis Diderot

Not only does Hugh Mungus have a dick the dimensions of a Budweiser beer bottle, he's also disturbed over the fact we're all slaves. As such, he ravenously researches, distilling the resources he's discovered into articles, books, blogs and "audiochapters," freely available to everyone.

You may find this genre unmarketable...but that's the point. This system is more deeply fucked than anybody receiving a fisting up to the elbow. Why the hell would Hugh want to be part of an order ― or lack, thereof ― engineered to destroy him, and every person on the planet?

Hence, marketing can go fuck itself with a dick dumb enough to penetrate its diseased dung hole! That said, Mungus is hopeful folks will skim his scribblings, as these stories supply substantial sagacity.

Pick an upload, and peruse. Each segment of these publications stands alone; messy memoirs ― based on true events ― driftin' outta the dirty desert. Follow the fuck junky ― a.k.a. Don Keedik, Hugh Mungus, Mike Oxhard ― in his crusade to copulate with 5,000 females.

Believe it or not, these tales are works of non-fiction...and dedicated to everybody.

"The one who learns and learns and doesn't practice is like the one who plows and plows and never plants."

― Plato

— authored by Hugh Mungus